“For a long time I was working towards moving up and it occurred to me three years ago I should get out of the rat race and expand out instead of move up. At first it was really fun to get out of the race…then it became painful not to have the identity I once got from my success and what people thought of me. I cracked and did unhealthy things. I didn’t like myself anymore.
[What got me through] was quiet. Meditation. Just being by myself. But being by myself in a very specific way. Because I used to be by myself in a way where I believed the voices in my head, but now I try to be very kind to these voices. There’s another voice now that feels like a kind parent saying it’s ok to feel that way. I have self-compassion now.
Giving myself permission to be happy is risky – it’s very vulnerable. It’s brave for me to be happy in a way. Self-compassion makes it safe for me to be that vulnerable, to not know, which is hard for a lot of men. I think all humans, really.
And gratitude comes from that self-compassion. Looking for simple things now – not big things like I used to anymore. Really small things that exist in this moment – everyday, boring things to be grateful for – these now make me happy.”
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Watch the entire clip here: http://goodmenproject.com/…/finding-happiness-vulnerable-s…/